Dreams never die

I always love reading a great human interest story- they make me so happy. This particular one is a great lesson proving that an old dream doesn't have to stay old.  The speed skater here took her childhood dream, spun it around, and is now, at 50, taking it to another level. 

Check the video out, and be inspired. 

Marriage advice for newbies

I tell Husband that we need all the help we can get when it comes to advice to a lasting marriage.  My grandparents have been married for 66 years.  Sixty-six!  Thinking about 20 years is mind boggling to me. 

I forwarded him this list after I read it and told him to review, so we can learn from other people's mistakes and hard earned wisdom.

1. Marriage will teach you more about yourself than you bargained for. Consider this a gift.
2. Don't complain about the cooking when your spouse is the cook.
3. Never decide to get a divorce when you have PMS. (Same principle applies when you have the flu, jet-lag, or you're chronically under-slept.)
4. When people say marriage is hard, believe them.
5. Never start the day off nagging or complaining.
6. An unwillingness to quarrel about something doesn't mean you agree with it.
7. Establish early on whether the question "do these pants make me look fat?" is a true yes or no question.
8. Clean is a relative term.
9. Generosity may be the key to all happiness.
10. Most of your fights are living proof of your immaturity. The sooner you grow up, the happier you'll be.
11. When you think you've tried everything, know that you haven't.
12. Admit your shortcomings. They're obvious anyway.
13. Express gratitude often.
14. Give up all hope of being perfectly understood.
15. Being right will eventually lose its appeal.
16. Many of the things you fight hard for will turn out not to have been worth the fight.
17. Be the first to apologize. Really. It's not as painful as it sounds.
18. It's idiotic to stay up late arguing about being too tired to have sex.
19. Pay more attention to what you're doing to make things go badly and pay less attention to what your spouse is doing.
20. When your spouse's behavior is open to interpretation, ascribe the higher motive.
21. If you're going to complain about something, come to the table with a suggested alternative.
22. Hatred is perfectly normal under the circumstances. Don't freak out about it or take it too seriously.
23. Your definition of sexy will change over time. New definition: husband going out in the pouring rain to latch the slamming back gate.
24. Do not underestimate how irritating your spouse's slightly irritating behaviors will become over time.
25. If you want something, recognize and accept that it's your job to ask for it.
26. The louder your spouse yells, the quieter and calmer you need to be.
27. Disappointment is inevitable. Life gets a lot easier once you accept this.
28. Sometimes you're going to do your unfair share. It's not worth whining about.
29. Forget the nonsense about not going to bed angry. Get some sleep. Chances are things will look different in the morning.
30. There's no end to how much you can love someone if you let yourself.
31. Accept apologies graciously.
32. Being happily married is not the same as living happily ever after.
33. There are no guaranteed divorce-proofing moves. All any of us can do is be a husband or wife our spouse would be foolish to leave.
34. Don't kid yourself into thinking you have all the time in the world.
35. "In love" pales in comparison to love.

Merry Christmas to all!

For those of you celebrating this beautiful holiday, Merry Christmas.  I hope you are with loved ones and feel the warmth, joy and hope this day signifies.

Here are my lovely grand parents, who have been married for 66 amazing years.  My grandmother always explains to anyone who will listen that they've 'NEVER had an argument' in her Bostonian accent.  It's adorable.  My grand father just smirks in response, because he knows, as do the rest of us, they never argued because he lovingly went along with whatever she wanted. 

This Christmas, my grand mother is in the hospital not doing as great as we would like. She's still with us, after almost 95 years, and for that, we are blessed.  Watching her fight to stay with us, despite the many obstacles that have come in her path, is nothing short of inspiring to watch. 

Stay strong, friends.  As strong as my Nene.
 

Glass Ceiling

My dad is a man's man who never wanted to admit there was a problem with the glass ceiling.  Until I started working with him, he didn't consider what it would be like if he was a woman.  Over time, and a series of talks where he would ask me questions and I would answer and challenge his opinions.  Now, at 65, I know my dad is quite a bit more open to my perspective.
 
In the work place, I was seen as bitchy and pushy, whereas men making the same requests would be seen as assertive.  It was never fair, but I learned how to work around it.  This advertisement is a reminder of the very real differences our society sees between men and women.    
 

End of life

A few days after thanksgiving my grandmother fell and broke her hip and her wrist.  She's almost 95 and we're into winter, which is not a good sign.  It's hard to wait and see what happens.  We thought we were going to lose her in the days after her fall, but as the true trooper she is, she's pushing through.  She's holding on, and NOT letting go.  The doctors are surprised she's held off as long as she has, now that it's 20 days later. 

Going through this process has introduced me to the challenges that people go through at the end of their lives. 

I read this article, and immediately thought of watching my helpless grandmother in the ICU.  All I wanted is for her to be at peace, and without all of those IVs going into her (there must have been 14 bags hanging around her that first day).  It was scary to see, so I'm certain it was scary for her to experience. 

"We are not helping these people by providing intensive care. Instead, we are turning their bodies into grotesque containers, and reducing their lives to a set of numbers monitoring input and output, lab values and vital signs, which we tweak to keep within normal ranges by adjusting our treatments, during the weeks and days immediately preceding their death. This is the opposite of what should be prioritized when a person is known to be nearing the end of their life without the hope of getting well."

Men don't understand

Although my husband and I were trying to get pregnant, we were both surprised, excited, weirded out all at the same time.  He was distracted when I told him, on his way out the door to a job interview.  His response to me was a curt, "good job."  It wasn't close to the response I wanted, but he was more enthusiastic a few hours later when he got back home. 

I felt compassion from N when I had a rough bout of morning sickness one night during my 7th week.  In what felt like an immediate moment in time, I was forced to run to the bathroom to throw up three times in a row.  That was the only time I threw up, but it served the purpose to showing N that this whole pregnancy was real, serious, and shouldn't be taken lightly. 

I haven't yet gone through labor, but it's safe to say I'm already pretty freaked out by the prospect.  I know that I'll get through it, because I have to and millions of other women have before me. Men, on the other hand, never have, and never will.  The whole process isn't fair given everything in our lives changes, and nothing in their life does. 

Today I saw this, and felt vilified. 

Strength from within

Most of the time I hate watching the news.  I only like to see the human interest stories.  In fact, love is more apt.  I love to watch the good things that can happen to people after they have experienced strife.  It gives me hope.

Reading this story about two brothers in Boston reminds me of how much I had growing up.  These boys not only survived amidst enormous challenges, they thrived.  I'm inspired by their courage and their fortitude.  I wish I could give them a fist pump and buy that one kid a north face jacket so he can fit in a little bit like the rest of the kids. 

It reminds me of what I read today about helping others.  " "Carry each others burdens, and in doing so, you fulfill the will of Christ in you." Gal. 6:2. Friends, let me ask you today, whose burdens are your carrying? Who are you encouraging and lifting up? Who are you helping to be all that God has created them to be? Friends, God wants us to lift the fallen, care for those in need. Who knows, you might be the only Bible someone might see today. Understand that when you go out each day not only focusing on where you want to be, but helping others get to where they need to be, remember me telling you that you are fulfilling the will of Christ in you."-Fr. Nicholas Louh
 

Baby Fear

When I think about having a baby, this video captures what I think it will probably be like.  I'm fairly certain my husband is certain that it will be sunshine and butterflies.  I try to prepare him he's in for a rude awakening.  But we'll just have to wait and see.  Maybe our baby will be perfect. 

Time to let yourself embrace the season

I love Christmas, and the joy it brings people.  This made me smile.
 

How do you plan for raising little girls?

We don't yet know if we are having a boy or a girl, although I can't help but think it's a girl.  If it is a girl, I'm worried already about how I'm going to raise her not to have body image issues.  I don't know anyone that doesn't have them. 

I read this and thought it was good advice to recall for the future:

1) There Will Be A Time When She Will Ask You “Am I Pretty?”

By Katie Makkai

2) Remember Girls Don’t Just Simply Decide To Hate Their Bodies, We Teach Them To

3) We Raise Our Girls To View Their Bodies As Projects To Be Constantly Improved

By Caroline Heldman the Sexy Lie

4) Don’t Let Her Think Like This

By Moonlight-path

5) It Starts With You

By smittenby

6) But We Know That Is Easier Said Than Done…

If you know the origin of this meme let us know so that we can credit.

7)Remember… The Pressure To Be Perfect Is Purely For Profit

Via Wang

8) And Its Impact Is Very Toxic

Via FamQuotes

8) Sooo… Less Diets And More Riots

By Crabby Girl

By Canada’s National Eating Disorder Information Centre

 9) And Be A Badass Like These Three Rockstars:

Via TheMetaPicture

9) Now Seriously…You Are Soooo Much More Than A Number

Via Favim.com

10) You Are Wonderfully Unique And Awesome Shaped

By satvikshop.com

By Now Foundation


Via pyxifit

10) Focus On Health And Function Not On Weight And Shape. These Are Different Things

By Go Kaleo

11) And Remember Never To Talk About Other People’s Bodies And Appearance. In Particular In Front Of  Your Daughter

Via Need to Know

12) Tell Your Little Girl That This Is The Essence Of Beauty:

Via hula-hips, quote by Steve Maraboli

Via ThingsWeSay (source of text unknown)

13) Tell Your Little Girl That Every Girl Is Beautiful In Her Own Way

By Camille


By NYC Girls Project

14) And If You Are Still Not Smiling After All This Body Love… Well… Here You Go :D

If you know the origin of this meme let us know so that we can credit.

By Gr8 ppl, Gr8 Thoughts

15) Check Out Our Collection Of Body Positive Books for Girls And Women here

Big News which leaves me bursting with joy

Have you ever had something so big and so exciting going on, that you can't think about anything else?  I have.  I've had this secret I've wanted to shout out about from the rooftops.  But I had to wait.

We have a baby on the way!  It still feels too good to be true, still, and I've had a few months to get used to the idea.  As soon as I found out about the baby, I was shocked.  Although we had been trying, I didn't think our timing was right that month.  I was also sad. I know how hard it is for so many other people to make their baby dreams come true, so my ease in getting pregnant seemed unfair in comparison. 

I wish that good didn't also come with bad, but that is the reality of our world, I have learned.  I absolutely don't want to look a gift horse in the mouth, so for now, I will say thank you to God.  Thank you for our very special blessing.