I tell Husband that we need all the help we can get when it comes to advice to a lasting marriage. My grandparents have been married for 66 years. Sixty-six! Thinking about 20 years is mind boggling to me.
I forwarded him this list after I read it and told him to review, so we can learn from other people's mistakes and hard earned wisdom.
1. Marriage will teach you more about yourself than you bargained for. Consider this a gift.
2. Don't complain about the cooking when your spouse is the cook.
3. Never decide to get a divorce when you have PMS. (Same principle applies when you have the flu, jet-lag, or you're chronically under-slept.)
4. When people say marriage is hard, believe them.
5. Never start the day off nagging or complaining.
6. An unwillingness to quarrel about something doesn't mean you agree with it.
7. Establish early on whether the question "do these pants make me look fat?" is a true yes or no question.
8. Clean is a relative term.
9. Generosity may be the key to all happiness.
10. Most of your fights are living proof of your immaturity. The sooner you grow up, the happier you'll be.
11. When you think you've tried everything, know that you haven't.
12. Admit your shortcomings. They're obvious anyway.
13. Express gratitude often.
14. Give up all hope of being perfectly understood.
15. Being right will eventually lose its appeal.
16. Many of the things you fight hard for will turn out not to have been worth the fight.
17. Be the first to apologize. Really. It's not as painful as it sounds.
18. It's idiotic to stay up late arguing about being too tired to have sex.
19. Pay more attention to what you're doing to make things go badly and pay less attention to what your spouse is doing.
20. When your spouse's behavior is open to interpretation, ascribe the higher motive.
21. If you're going to complain about something, come to the table with a suggested alternative.
22. Hatred is perfectly normal under the circumstances. Don't freak out about it or take it too seriously.
23. Your definition of sexy will change over time. New definition: husband going out in the pouring rain to latch the slamming back gate.
24. Do not underestimate how irritating your spouse's slightly irritating behaviors will become over time.
25. If you want something, recognize and accept that it's your job to ask for it.
26. The louder your spouse yells, the quieter and calmer you need to be.
27. Disappointment is inevitable. Life gets a lot easier once you accept this.
28. Sometimes you're going to do your unfair share. It's not worth whining about.
29. Forget the nonsense about not going to bed angry. Get some sleep. Chances are things will look different in the morning.
30. There's no end to how much you can love someone if you let yourself.
31. Accept apologies graciously.
32. Being happily married is not the same as living happily ever after.
33. There are no guaranteed divorce-proofing moves. All any of us can do is be a husband or wife our spouse would be foolish to leave.
34. Don't kid yourself into thinking you have all the time in the world.
35. "In love" pales in comparison to love.
I forwarded him this list after I read it and told him to review, so we can learn from other people's mistakes and hard earned wisdom.
1. Marriage will teach you more about yourself than you bargained for. Consider this a gift.
2. Don't complain about the cooking when your spouse is the cook.
3. Never decide to get a divorce when you have PMS. (Same principle applies when you have the flu, jet-lag, or you're chronically under-slept.)
4. When people say marriage is hard, believe them.
5. Never start the day off nagging or complaining.
6. An unwillingness to quarrel about something doesn't mean you agree with it.
7. Establish early on whether the question "do these pants make me look fat?" is a true yes or no question.
8. Clean is a relative term.
9. Generosity may be the key to all happiness.
10. Most of your fights are living proof of your immaturity. The sooner you grow up, the happier you'll be.
11. When you think you've tried everything, know that you haven't.
12. Admit your shortcomings. They're obvious anyway.
13. Express gratitude often.
14. Give up all hope of being perfectly understood.
15. Being right will eventually lose its appeal.
16. Many of the things you fight hard for will turn out not to have been worth the fight.
17. Be the first to apologize. Really. It's not as painful as it sounds.
18. It's idiotic to stay up late arguing about being too tired to have sex.
19. Pay more attention to what you're doing to make things go badly and pay less attention to what your spouse is doing.
20. When your spouse's behavior is open to interpretation, ascribe the higher motive.
21. If you're going to complain about something, come to the table with a suggested alternative.
22. Hatred is perfectly normal under the circumstances. Don't freak out about it or take it too seriously.
23. Your definition of sexy will change over time. New definition: husband going out in the pouring rain to latch the slamming back gate.
24. Do not underestimate how irritating your spouse's slightly irritating behaviors will become over time.
25. If you want something, recognize and accept that it's your job to ask for it.
26. The louder your spouse yells, the quieter and calmer you need to be.
27. Disappointment is inevitable. Life gets a lot easier once you accept this.
28. Sometimes you're going to do your unfair share. It's not worth whining about.
29. Forget the nonsense about not going to bed angry. Get some sleep. Chances are things will look different in the morning.
30. There's no end to how much you can love someone if you let yourself.
31. Accept apologies graciously.
32. Being happily married is not the same as living happily ever after.
33. There are no guaranteed divorce-proofing moves. All any of us can do is be a husband or wife our spouse would be foolish to leave.
34. Don't kid yourself into thinking you have all the time in the world.
35. "In love" pales in comparison to love.
